I'll Bet This Is Highly Effective Birth Control

KNITTED RUBBER, IN COTTON.

Includes instructions if a longer rubber is needed.

(Yes, I realize this is extremely sophomoric humor.)

This makes an excellent substitute for a sponge for children, and can be so easily kept nice and free from grease and so quickly renewed that it will be a favourite manner of knitting for the nursery.

Materials : Knitting cotton No. 6 (white only), two knitting needles, No. 10.

Cast on 78 stitches and knit 4 rows of plain knitting.

—1st row of pattern. Knit 3, *, make 1 by putting the thread in front, slip 1, knit 2 together, repeat from * 23 time* more, knit 3

—2nd row. Knit plain.

—3rd row. Knit 3, *, knit 2 together, slip 1, make 1, repeat from * 23 times more, knit 3.

—4th row. Knit plain.

Repeat these 4 rows 24 times (more if requiring a longer rubber), knit 4 rows (NB - I believe this refers to a garter st border); and to form a loop for hanging up the rubber cast off 33 stitches, knit 8, turn, cast off 4, and on the remaining 4 work 16 rows, place the 4 stitches to the first 4 stitches of the remaining 37, and cast off together, cast off the remainder of the row.

From The Queenslander, January 8, 1906

ROTFLMAO!

Ha ha ha ha ha!


Okay, I confess, I don't get the joke, unless he's knitting them up out of steel wool, or knitting extra lumps into them...

It's from The Argus, Melbourne, Australia, 26 June 1941. Perhaps Australian humor is just different.

This cartoon, and the patterns below, are courtesy of the National Library of Australia. You can search out lovely patterns, and even correct the robotic translation if you're bored and anal. Apparently there's also some way to list these on Ravelry, but don't ask me for details. A Rarer Borealis posted in more detail about posting there. Me, I'm content to browse for myself only - but I am tagging articles "knit, knitting" in part because I tend to forget I've already looked at something.

If you're one of us obsessives who seek out patterns from any weird old newspaper, this is a real treasure trove.

I'm posting these as a sample of what I've found. They're not special in any way, really - just a sample of what you can find. These were published in the ladies' Sunday supplement. I guess it had gossip and crap like "Parade" magazine did (haven't read it in 35 years), but also nifty knitting patterns. "Parade" was never that awesome.

   

Meh, the print isn't quite as large on the pattern text as I'd like. I've saved the originals, which are large enough that even I can read them, so if you want them emailed to you just leave me a comment.

ETA: Of course,  clicking on the images will bring up larger versions. Just not as large as I'd hoped.

I'll post more as I root around on the site.